There was no catholicism before 325
when a bunch of guys adopted a creed
saying so in the city of Nicea, Turkey.
Until then there had been losely
connected yet often rival schools
of what might be called redemptive
philosophy…so who cares?
Well, the religion known as
Roman Catholicism isn’t 2000 years old
it’s not quite 1700 years old and the “Roman”
bit wasn’t there to begin with either.
Listen, if I invent a creed to say some guy
swooped down from the sky on the back
of a canary in 1755 and set fire to the city
of Lisbon `[just so people would pray
and pay money to see it put out]
then I haven’t given birth to a
I’ve just gone crazy in 2017.
…and Martin Luther was a catholic monk,
so don’t you wasps go getting up on your high horse either.
(I use the date of the great Lisbon earthquake; in the days following, fire did break out in those parts of the city not hit by the tsunami that followed the earthquake.)